Just Another Routine Mission
by Red Witch
Summary: Goose and Doc go another fun mission on another wacky planet to fight another crazy bad guy. Same old, same old.


**A dragon ate up the disclaimer saying that I don't own any Galaxy Ranger Characters. Just a silly little blurb that ran through my deranged mind. Again. **

**Just Another Routine Mission**

"It is **not **my fault every time we crash!" Shane snapped. "That meteor came out of nowhere!"

"It was right in front of us!" Doc snapped back. "Did you not hear me **screaming:** LOOK OUT FOR THAT METEOR?"

"What are you complaining about? There's only minor damage to the ship and it can still fly! I'll fix it after the mission!" Shane snapped as the rangers entered the small alien city.

"Gooseman! The wheels are missing!" Doc yelled. And the side of the ship is **dented!" **

"Look can this wait until later?" Shane asked. "We're here. This is a potential ally to join the League of Planets after all. Provided we can help them with whatever problem they're all worked up about."

"I dunno Gooseman," Doc looked around. "I've heard about Planet Khakki. It's not exactly a thriving metropolis or powerhouse. It's so out of the way and there's so little to steal even the lowest criminals don't even bother coming out here."

"Oh they come all right," A prim green skinned lizard like alien with a beak and purple robes and hat walked up to them. "But they come to get new clothes. I am Yergle, Chief of the Hakki. Our people are known for their skill as tailors throughout the universe. And by the way I love your uniforms! They're **fabulous!**"

"Thanks," Doc blinked. "I'm Ranger Hartford and this is Ranger Gooseman. What seems to be the trouble here?"

"Our people are being terrorized by a monstrous demon!" Yergle gulped. "Which not only forces our people to go into hiding, it keeps our customers away!"

"Oh is **that** all?" Doc rolled his eyes.

"Hellslayer is a horrible demon who has been burning our buildings and stores, terrorizing our people and shredding everything and everyone he gets his giant claws on," Yergle said. "In other words he's really starting to get annoying so we were hoping that you guys would take care of him for us before he murders us all. If you can do it before Thursday it would be nice."

"Why don't you guys just **shoot** him?" Shane asked. "I mean you have blasters right?"

"Yeah but we can't shoot him," Yergle said.

"Because blasters don't work?" Doc asked.

"We're pretty sure they don't," Yergle said.

"Pretty sure?" Shane raised an eyebrow.

"Well that's because no one has actually went out and fought him," Yergle said. "But our most revered and wisest prophet Klinecalvin said that blasters wouldn't work and we trust him so…"

"Did this prophet of yours try and fight him?" Shane asked, dreading the answer.

"No he just told us why we couldn't," Yergle looked at a large bush. "Isn't that right?"

"Oh yes oh yes oboyo!" A hand stuck out of the bush. "I had a vision that no one born from a mother's womb or hatched from a father's egg could defeat the demon and my visions are on the money!"

"Let me see if I get this straight," Doc groaned. "No one here has even **tried** to stop this guy because of a stupid prophecy?"

"That and we're complete and utter cowards," Yergle said. "Seriously, we're a race of tailors and fashion critics. The only thing we can put together is a snappy ensemble for the fall season and tear it down with a scathing review and snappy banter."

"So where is this demon?" Shane let out an annoyed breath.

**"RRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRR!" **

"That would be him!" Yergle dove under a large bucket.

"Mr. Hellslayer I presume?" Doc looked at the eleven foot tall red demon with large horns, huge teeth, four arms and claws and a tail. It was wearing armored pants and a fur vest and a skull necklace and it snorted out black smoke from it's nostrils. It held a sword in one hand and a huge mace in another.

"Mortals prepare to die!" The Hellslayer laughed manically. "I will slice the meat from your bones and sup on your marrow!"

"Oh brother," Doc sighed. "Don't these bad guys ever think of anything **original** to say?"

"We're allowed to shoot demons right?" Shane asked Doc. "I mean we can kill them?"

"Oh yeah," Doc nodded. "The Galaxy Ranger Regulations say that you can use lethal force on evil demons if there's no way to reason with them. They're not like aliens or anything."

"I wonder why?" Shane remarked. "What is it a zip code thing or something?"

"Who cares? Just get **rid** of it!" Yergle whined as he hid under the large bucket.

"Try mortals!" Hellslayer hissed. "Not that you could really. Oh sure even if you managed to destroy my body my spirit would just end up back in the dark dimension for about a thousand years before I could reform a new body in this world. But it's impossible to destroy me!"

"In other words we can blow you up without any guilt," Doc said casually. "That's nice."

"You can't destroy me!" Hellslayer howled with laughter. "No one born from a mother or father can kill me! But you are allowed to try! Go ahead! Give me your best shot! You can't beat me! There's no possible way!"

"I was born in a test tube, moron," Shane said as he casually whipped out his blaster and shot the demon. "Stupid prophecy doesn't apply to me."

"Oh crap," Hellslayer noticed he now had a huge hole in his chest. "AAAHH! WHAT A STUPID WORLD THIS IS! AAAHHH!" His body disintegrated.

"Another day, another menace to the universe blown up," Shane casually put his blaster back in it's holster. "I tell you Doc we need to get more interesting assignments."

"That was quick," Yergle blinked as he came out from under the bucket. "Boy you Rangers sure don't mess around do you?"

"Okay so we're done here right?" Doc asked.

"Looks like it," Shane nodded. He looked at Yergle. "Any other monsters you need taken care of while we're here?"

"Could you do something about my mother in law?" Yergle blinked.


End file.
